if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize