woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Randomize
