Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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