Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
