and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
