she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
