i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Randomize
