Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
