your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
what day is it and did you see me today?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
