i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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