when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
