You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
