did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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