Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
