I'm gonna have a badass scar
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
