I am puke
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
What a dumb baby whore.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
