I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
