is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
