My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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