if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Randomize
