So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
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