is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
