I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
We talked him into tasing himself.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
