glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Randomize
