AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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