I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
