Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Are we still banned from the library?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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