I hate all girls vehemently.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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