I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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