I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
