Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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