ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
