Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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