Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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