worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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