who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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