Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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