ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm experimenting with sincerity
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
