She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
