Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
