Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Randomize
