Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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