I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
