Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
