Whatcha textin bout Willis?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
