You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
