She's JV to your varsity
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
