S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
