The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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