i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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